Nov 12, 2026: holding on

Let's start with what most idiots jabber on to each other about when they don't know what else to say. The weather.

Boy, it sure is getting cold out there.

It is getting to that point where walking outside without a coat on will no longer be feasible. The problem there is how much I like to move through the world like a ninja and as unremarkable as possible. If I have to put a coat on to go for a walk, now the jig is up. Busted. I've given away the game.

Plus, pictures of the stairwell are less fun.

I found myself emotional tonight. Not because of [redacted] persay. It's just that me getting emotional then overflowed into how I am feeling about [redacted] and my pending promotion. I was thinking about these ten folks that report to me today and how eight of them won't report to me at some point soon. Regardless if the number is eight or ten, I think on what all of these folks have done for me this past year and how much they carried me along the way......it's emotional. I want to believe I helped them more than not, but who really knows?

Point is, I landed with them as a wounded bird and they helped to pick me back up again. I've grown a bunch this past year and they all have played a massive role in that evolution. I plan to tell them all of this when we let them know that the times are a changing and that I won't be the bossman much longer.

The goal is to not cry like a bitch while doing so. lulz

When I pulled into the driveway after work I was met with an unexpected car and an unexpected visitor. Long story short; they are very much struggling and I am very much struggling to know how to support them. It wasn't pleasant. I said some things that I have long wanted to say. I don't know that I said them the right way. I meant them the rigth way though. From there, you hope and you love. Ya dig?

Any time I experience another person's pain, I can't help but then reflect on my own. It's our shared human impulse, isn't it? I experience you through my lense. You do the same. We float across this univeral expanse together and......what?

With this much pain involved, it is difficult to know what is right from wrong.

We interrupt your regularly scheduled family trauma with lulu calling me to wonder how you operate the vision insurance. She's living her first life, ya dig?

That also gave me an opportunity to whistle, chirp, and call out gulliver's name to get him all excited. He's a full idiot you see and grandpa showing up via video call is just enough for him to attack beautiful young lady's face. Over excited gully means sloppy kisses and I was happy to stir the pot. 🫠

More often than not when I stir the pot, good things happen. Sometimes though......not so much. Tonight, we hope for the good things happen bit.

It is okay to feel pain. Always remember that. Says me to me.

It was a the war on drugs kind of night. There's a hopeful ache that I find within their music.